Karamel Sutra
by Patrick the Stump
Summary: Ice cream, in Lucy's opinion, was far better than sex - With a dead end job, a pointless degree and a rapidly expanding waist line, Lucy Weasley is pretty sure that she's having a midlife crisis at the ripe old age of twenty-one.


**AN**: This is my first multi chapter in a while and I probably won't keep on top of it at all, but I haven't written LucyLorcan in ages so I thought meh, why not.

Disclaimer: Yeah, Harry Potter belongs to J.K Rowling and Ben and Jerry's belongs to Mr Ben and Mr Jerry, of course.

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**Karamel Sutra **

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Chapter One: Chocolate Fudge Brownie

When, Lucy wondered, had she really become one of_ those_ people. The closest thing she had to a real boyfriend was her cat, Albert. Of course, she _had_ been having wild, promiscuous affairs with her many tubs of Ben and Jerry's, so she couldn't exactly complain. Ice-cream, in Lucy's opinion, was far better than sex. A tub full of Chocolate Fudge Brownie tends not to sleep with your cousin, at least.

Lucy pushed the battered trolley down the confectionary aisle as she swept hoards of sweets and biscuits atop her already plentiful supply – _the diet_, she told herself, _would start tomorrow_. Of course, the diet had always _started tomorrow_ since the day she'd turned fifteen, and in all honestly, she was really rather glad that tomorrow never seemed to come around.

Blaming her excessive chocolate intake on her studies and the emotional turmoil of the previous year made Lucy feel a little better – if she got fat, then it wouldn't be her fault at all. She could blame every last bit of it on her boss – a grumpy old librarian that was now running Flourish and Blots; her advanced ancient ruins teacher, Ms Novikov; and her cheating, lying, downright prick of an ex-boyfriend, Scorpius Malfoy. And then, of course, there was her annoying, prying family that always wanted to know how the diet was going or if she'd found a man that actually liked her this time. This, coupled with the fact that Scorpius Malfoy always seemed to be lurking around the Weasley home – either visiting Al, or more often than not, Rose – had caused Lucy's fondness for her family to fade over the past year. In all honesty, if Lucy heard another spectacular, amazing thing that a member of her family happened to do then she was pretty sure that she would explode, leaving a sticky mess of coffee and ice cream all over the ceiling.

So now, Lucy tended to spend all her time with her ambitious, but nonetheless under-achieving friends, Eliza Flint and Isabelle Vane. Tonight, it was Lucy's turn to buy the chocolate, the cakes and the red wine, which was the reason that she was traipsing round a brightly lit muggle supermarket in the first place, spending what seemed like this month's entire pay check on junk food and cheap alcohol. The trolley, which had seen better days anyway, was an utter pain in the arse to manoeuvre. It had a dodgy wheel, which was constantly jutting out to the side, tripping up unsuspecting shoppers and forcing Lucy to deviate from her original route. Lucy, having quite enough of the rogue trolley, yanked the stupid bloody thing around, practically crushing the tall man examining the wine in the adjacent aisle.

Lucy wasn't normally rude, but after a full day of translating page upon page of ruins, her manners weren't really at the forefront of her mind.

"Aren't you going to apologise then?" called a voice from behind her – probably the man that she'd nearly killed with her trolley.

Lucy whipped her trolley around rather ungracefully, flatting several small children.

"I'm very sorry," she started, not completely certain if she was supposed to sound as sarcastic as she was coming across. She was yanking on the handles of her trolley, trying to pull it around, when she caught sight of the man's face for the first time.

"Bloody hell," Lucy said as she let go of her trolley and turned to face him, "Lorcan – I haven't seen you since Hogwarts!"

Lorcan smiled, "Yeah, it has been a while."

Lucy stood there awkwardly, not entirely sure what to do or say. She had been close to Lorcan at one point, being in the same house and all, but like most other people Lucy had known, he'd fallen out of contact with her pretty much as soon as she'd left school. She shifted her weight from one foot to the other.

"How're you?" she said, breaking the silence.

"I'm okay," he replied, "I got an apprenticeship at Gringotts, working in curse-breaking, you know? I travel a lot – I had a couple of weeks off though, so I came home for bit."

"Wow," Lucy said, a little envious. While Lorcan was off gallivanting around, breaking curses and seeing the world, Lucy was stuck between a job in a bookshop that was so low paid it was practically exploitation and a dull degree in Ancient Ruins that was likely to get her nowhere. And she'd got much better NEWTs than him, for Merlin's sake!

"What're you up to now?" Lorcan asked, and Lucy sighed.

"I'm doing Further Ancient Ruins, and minoring in magical languages as an extra," she said.

"Sounds uhm…" Lorcan started, but trailed off.

"Like the most horrific, boring thing in the entire world?" Lucy suggested, and Lorcan laughed.

"No," he corrected, "Not horrific exactly, just a lot of hard work – no wonder you're throwing a party, I'd need one too after a week that stressful." Lorcan nodded at the trolley which was piled high with chocolate, sweets, crisps, fizzy drinks, alcohol and chocolate fudge brownie ice-cream.

Lucy's ears went red – well, that was it – the amount of food she consumed on a regular basis was the equivalent to that of a large party of fully grown adults. Awesome.

Lucy pretended to laugh, "No, this is just my monthly shop. This is the kind of things that keeps a flat full of three girls afloat – we need our sugar, you know."

"Three girls?" Lorcan said, "Did things not work out with Scorpius, then?"

Blimey, Lorcan must've been out the country for a bloody long time. Everyone in the wizarding world seemed to know about her breakup with Scorpius.

"No," Lucy smiled tightly. Sure, Lucy was pretty much over the git now, but the wound was still a little sore, she had to admit.

"I'm sorry about that," Lorcan said quietly.

Lucy coughed, snapping out of it, and continued, "I'm not, he's a complete and utter prat. I'm kind of glad I escaped when I could."

Lorcan chuckled, "So, who're you living with now? Your cousins, there's so many of them?"

"No," Lucy laughed, the prospect of living with any of her family members tickled her for some reason – maybe it was because she couldn't stand to be in the same room as most of them without wanting to jump off a cliff, "You remember Eliza and Isabelle, right? "

"Oh, of course," Lorcan said, "Eliza and Isabelle. They were in Hufflepuff with us, weren't they?"

"Yeah," Lucy replied, "they're still as mad as ever."

Somebody behind Lorcan coughed, waiting to get past. They'd been blocking the aisle for at least five minutes.

"I better go," Lucy said, hoping that her ice-cream wasn't melting, "But it was nice catching up with you – tell Lysander I said hi."

Lorcan turned around to leave, but then paused and turned back again, "Actually, Lysander's having a party tonight – apparently it's to welcome me back, but I'm pretty sure it's just an excuse to get drunk, seeing as though I know nobody that's been invited. I'm sure he'd like to see you, if you want to come. I'm actually surprised you're not already coming, most of your family' going."

_Family_, Lucy thought,_ not a good idea._

Instead, she said, "I've already promised Eliza and Isabelle a girly night in – we've rented some movies and stuff, and I don't really think it would be fair to cancel on them now."

"Oh," Lorcan said, "I'm sure they'd be able to come too – if I remember Eliza right, I'm sure she'd love a good party."

Lucy cringed – she was cornered now. Inside her head she imagined a squealing Eliza, and Lucy knew that she would never live it down if she rejected Lorcan's invitation.

"Really?" Lucy said, hoping Lorcan would change his mind, "Are you sure that would be okay?"

"Yeah," Lorcan beamed, scribbling down the information onto a piece of paper, "Definitely!" He handed the scrap paper with the address on to Lucy, and smiled one last time, "I'll see you later then."

Lorcan turned away, leaving Lucy with a familiar sense of dread in her stomach. Studying and working twenty-four-seven tended to have anti-social effects on people, Lucy especially. And what had he said, about her family being there? Lucy wasn't sure if she could stand being around Lily or Roxanne, or even Dominique, who she had once liked to a certain extent. They all got on her nerves, and she was pretty sure she got on theirs. The worst case scenario was that Rose would be there – then Lucy would have to leave straight away. No excuses, no apologies, she would be out of there faster than a thestral with a coffee high.

Lucy paid for her food, now very glad that she'd remembered the alcohol, as she was definitely going to need it if she was supposed to get through the rest of the night. She apparated home, almost toppling over as she landed just outside the door of her small London flat.

"Get ready, we're going out," Lucy said as she stumbled through the door, still carrying the shopping bags which, needless to say, nobody rushed to help her with.

"Out?" Isabelle asked, looking up from the moth-eaten sofa on which she was sat, playing some sort of violent video game, probably involving zombies. She furrowed her eyebrows, confused, as if 'out' was such an unusual place to go – for Isabelle, it was.

"Out!" squealed Eliza, running over to Lucy, clapping her hands and jumping repeatedly on the spot.

This was going to be a very long night

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**AN**: I don't know when this will be updated, hopefully soon, as writing this gave me even more plot bunnies. Oh yeah, and **please don't favourite without reviewing.**


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